I've been looking out the window this morning in an attempt to quiet my mind. My thoughts are racing, I have a million things I need to do today. But first I'm going to sit for awhile, drink some coffee, breathe and start writing. I write when I'm stressed. I have no idea how it works but somehow divulging, purging and even coaxing these words from my heart lifts an enormous weight. So why all the stress? I'm getting married on Sunday. Yes, on Sunday, the Sunday that comes in 6 days from now! Gulp!
Next week at this time all the wedding madness will be over. All the pretty little details I have been mulling over, second guessing and spending an inordinate amount of time putting together will be memories tucked away for safe keeping. When I break it down that way it helps me to not take it all too seriously. From the very beginning Mike and I have said that we could easily go to the courthouse wearing jeans and t-shirts to get married. No muss, no fuss, which I know Mike would have been very happy to do. But the girl inside of me, the one that had so many broken dreams and fractured pieces wanted, desired and needed to make beautiful memories. I guess you could say I wanted a fresh start, a do-over, a new beginning. I'm not looking for the fairytale or have any crazy expectations. My expectations are always reserved. But quietly I dream of building a gentle and loving life together. More then anything I am so utterly thankful for this second chance at love.
Mike wisely said to me today, "Lynne please don't be stressed about this week, just relax and enjoy all the fun adventures we will have with our families."
So here's to the week ahead and to all the memories we are about to make.
Oh, about the ring. For those of you that know me, you know that I love anything vintage. Perhaps it's because I love the stories behind the pieces, the history, the imperfections. This is a 125 year old Victorian ring. It is not perfect, it has scuffs and blemishes but it's beautiful and unique and I instantly fell in love with it the first time I saw it. Perhaps it's because it reminds me so much of us and our story, perfectly imperfect.